Why can't I learn?

I consider myself a nice person. I try to be kind, polite, considerate, and help others when I can. Usually, I think most people would agree that I actually am nice, and would say the things I just said are true.

Sometimes, despite my best intentions, I screw up. I say something thoughtless. I write something thoughtless. I am in my own world and I'm rude: stepping in front of someone without ever having seen they were there and about to step that way. If I do something that is hurtful, I always feel terrible. Even the little mistakes make be feel badly, but the ones where I hurt someone's feelings are the worst.

I recently wrote something personal, and shared it, never thinking as I wrote that someone else might take it the wrong way. Although financially conservative, I am socially liberal. Live and let live, it takes all kinds, and everyone has the right to choose the way they want to live as long as it doesn't infringe on someone else's rights. Then I go and say something dumb and thoughtless.

South Florida is very diverse. Many people think that there is a large Cuban population, and there is. But there is also a large Venezuelan, Argentinian, Brazilian, Haitian, Jamaican, Jewish, Gay, Russian, Honduran, Senior Citizen, etc., ... you name it ... population here too. I work with a diverse population too, from around the USA and the world, so every other kind of group, religion, nationality, sexual preference, ethnicity, age, etc., is represented. I embrace it, enjoy it, and have friends representing countless of these groups of people. I can't even keep track, and I don't try. I love them all for who they are inside, and I enjoy their uniqueness.

I envy the young people today who really see all of the diversity as an irrelevant blur. I grew up in a time when fences were falling, but there were still distinctions made, and self-imposed division and social segregation. Equal opportunity meant knowing which group people belonged to so that you could have x number from column A and y number from column B, etc. I guess, try as I might to not let any of that matter, I still see the differences. I note them, even though my choices and actions show that I put that aside, and I see the person more than anything else. I'm not as perfect in this regard as I wish to be.

So if I write something about myself that implies something positive or negative about a group of people, is that letting bias show or is that because the lines have blurred and my level of acceptance is such that I didn't expect anyone to take offense? Or is it just that I wrote it too quickly and didn't think about the implications?

In this most recent case, it was the last one. I didn't think. Did I also let my bias show? I didn't mean it that way. Has political correctness gone too far?

I recognize that we are all human and make mistakes. I'm always trying to improve and to be a better person. These kinds of mistakes happen when I'm rushed or preoccupied, and never on purpose. Why can't I learn from this and avoid the mistakes? Is there a way to avoid being preoccupied or rushed? Is it possible to be completely in the moment, poised and perfect every time? Should I just accept that I'm human, and so is everyone else, and that sometimes I'll fail to meet my high standards? I'll make mistakes, and will need to apologize. Is an apology enough? If I'm such a nice person, why does it happen? Is it because I'm such a nice person that it bothers me and that I care, and feel badly that I've made the mistake? Foremost is the question, why can't I learn and be better? Why must I stumble? What can I do to improve and change?